So, I have had no choice but to live the nightmare of the last 6 days, none of my wishes that it wasn't real has benen granted and I am left to deal with the aftermath.
It is real, I have lost the baby that I have fought so hard for, prayed so hard for, wished so hard for and dreamed of. My dream is over and I have no choice but to learn how to deal with it. Spending all day on Tuesday in the hospital was heart breaking; every where we went there were couple celebrating whilst nurses told us how sorry they were. I cried so many times just didn't know what to do, what to say.
At the moment I am tired of people telling me how strong I am, how I will cope and how things wll get better, right now this doesn't help nor can I see it. I also hate the line ' well it worked once, you can get pregnant again' - it is not the point, I wanted that baby, that life, that dream and it has been snatched away from me for a reason that I will never know or understand. I want to scream about the injustice of it but all I can manage is to cry out my grief, frustration and anger. Why does life have to be so unfair, what did I do wrong?
I have so many unanswered questions but nowhere to look for the answers, all I keep asking is what else can go wrong?
what else can be taken from me?
what next?
No comments:
Post a Comment