Comfort

The thought that has taken my mind today is that of food and how I eat. The stresses and strains of the last 2 plus years have brought home to me more and more how much I rely on food as a comforter - a chocolate bar becuase I am having a bad day, a take away because I am down in the dumps and can't be bothered to cook or biscuits because they give me the sugar rush that, momentarily, lifes my spirits a little bit.



I am sure I am not alone in these habits and the more I look back into them, the more I can see that I have always done this and could be the answer to the question ' why I am not a size 10'. So the challenge was to try and break the cycle and for 6 months I thought I had managed it. My diet was better, I lost nearly 2 stone and felt miles better but then something occured which smashed me back down and to this day I have no really restarted my healhier eating habits properly again.



By the way, all this is written as I try and stop myself from eating the seond half of a pack of giner biscuits I bought earlier. I know I am not hungry, I did eat my lunch but it is almost as if I can't stop myself.



So I wonder, on top of comfort eating, do I reward myself with food? So, if I can survive the next 10 minutes then I can have another bicsuit to see me through the 10 minutes after that? There is not rational explanation for it nor can I justify it, it is just something that is.